The Present Prize #4: Family Matters
blog news personal The Present Prize
“For those who have defied the advice of mentors and gallerists by deciding to raise children while also pursuing an artistic practice, it can be hard to know how to proceed. While many well-known artists have managed to be engaged parents while pursing successful careers, mention of this creative balancing act is largely absent from critical discourse, and so we find ourselves reinventing the wheel again and again.” -Christa Donner, Cultural ReProducers (Half Letter Press, 2014)Over the past 4 years, since our girls were born, Oliver and I have become more and more aware of the challenges and struggles parents go through in balancing a creative practice and raising children. Remember when you were a teenager and full of angst and relationships were just hard sometimes? When life’s big questions felt like they needed an answer, now? When you were struggling to find out who you were and how you were going to find your place in the world? I’ve found that becoming a parent is sort of like that: challenging emotionally, full of identity crises, and a process that involves a re-alignment of your priorities and world view. That’s not to say it’s all bad – in fact, if we stick with the high school metaphor, think of all the strong memories you have from those short 4 years and compare that number to any previous set of 4 years. All that change, those struggles, those questions of identity that challenge us can make space for beautiful new things to happen, for a new open-ness to experiences, and for spaces of awe and wonder.

Too many artistic lives are built for single, childless, workaholic 23-year-olds. That can’t last. Raising children forces us to change, and that is good in the long run for us and for our field. It’s true that I could no longer write grants at midnight when I had a kid. But thank god I stopped writing grants at midnight, right? – Andrew Simonet, Artists Raising KidsThe adjustment that happens after having kids happens to everyone who has kids. You know it will happen, but it’s still surprising when it does. But sometimes it forces us to face things that were not working. We stopped taking jobs – either self-assigned or asked for by others – that didn’t pay or didn’t have at least some small stipend or grant attached to it. It forced us to professionalize in that way. I used to be a floral designer. Now I rarely take a job because the cost of childcare is the same as what I would bring in. Instead I do web design more professionally now, where I can work less for more money. I’m pregnant again and am looking forward to and dreading the phase that will come this fall, so this topic is close to my mind. But before that happens, Oliver and I want to announce our call for nominations for the next Present Prize – to be given to someone balancing a creative practice and parenthood. The money we give away might be enough for a month of daycare, for some on-demand childcare, or for whatever else the parent in question needs. Let’s reward someone for making the time, for playing the long game, for proving it can be done, for taking a break or taking it slow for a while, for being selfish while at the same time giving all of themselves, and for setting the example for their kids that balance is possible – you just have to work at it. Because in the end, family matters.


As winter continues on into it’s doldrums, you can do a nice thing for your houseplants and give them a shower! The dry air from heat doesn’t do these guys any good. A tepid shower fully hydrates them, gives them a nice dose of humidity, and cleans off their dusty leaves. They will reward you for your efforts with renewed growth and a little extra green, all of which helps when the days are very grey.
3 run home run!
World Series Champions
City Hall decked out in orange and black


Here’s the story, spelling intact:
Once apon a time there was a little village inside a forest. Inside the village everyone was always sad and dreary.
One day a painter came into the village to paint. When he started to paint the people, he realized that they always had frowns on their faces.
The painter wanted to know why, so he would pick a dfferent spot each day, sit there, and watch the people.
Pretty soon he saw that there were no families, romances or friends. The painter wanted to end this, so he got to work.
He painted beautiful pictures about love and some about friendship.
Then the next week he picked a day and gave away all the paintings on one condition. The condition was that all the villagers had to give their paintings to someone else on the day after next.
He ran out of paintings that day, but that night he made some paintings. Before the day that every one had to give their paintings, the painter made sure everyone in the village had a painting.
On the day that everyone gave their paintings to someone else, everyone was happy. From then on they did this every year, except only with cards, and this was the begining of Valentine’s Day.
The End.
xoxoxooxoxoxooxoxooxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxo!














An early snowshoe and the muddy, muddy road that leads to our house.




Oliver says that I seriously cut myself every six months. Seeems about right. Luckily, after last night’s tetnus booster I don’t have to go to the ER (hopefully) for another 7 years.
PS- it isn’t as bad as it looks.
From Wednesday night’s vigil and rally at City Hall, San Francisco








